Friday, October 14, 2011


I am pleased to announce that my eldest daughter, Rebecca, is engaged to be married. The lucky gent is Simon Esmond.  The title of this post is 'courtship'.  I don't really have a lot to say about that here but want to make a couple of observations.

First, the basic idea of courtship is that the parents of the bride are involved in the process of her choosing a mate.   That's the main principle. The methods in different homes and churches will be various.  The parents actually have veto power over her decision in the area of choosing a husband. That may strike some as arcane in our day of ultimate personal freedom.  But it is also an accurate and clear biblical principle.

Second, in order for the father of the bride to cash the check of close and even controlling involvement in his daughter's courtship leading up to marriage, he has to have a big savings account.  If he does not have enough put away in that account, when it comes time to cash the check on some difficult decisions, say, turning down a suitor, he may find that he has to quickly and radically alter his view of 'where we go from here.'

Third, the outcome is wholly reliant upon the good grace and mercy of our Lord.  It is true that both the daughter and the father have free will and at the point of decision or conflict, they will do whatever seems best to them at that point. However, God gives us promises with our children, not just children. If we raise them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, we should have every confidence that at the point of decision, they will choose to follow God and do what is right, even to the point of trusting their father who has, Lord willing, a large of enough checking account to be trusted.

I am pleased to say that the Lord has brought together two such young people, Simon and Rebecca, who were raised in the nurture and admonition of the Lord and have proved that in the way that they have loved God and their parents and have submitted to and honored both.

I trust the Lord will give them many wonderful and fruitful years together.

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